By Bro. Jo Stern, on May 6th, 2010
 I was saying to the missus, on this general erection day morning, how I was feeling strangely nostalgic for the weird excitement I remember feeling as a kid when parties used to drive past our house blurting toss through a megaphone in the build up to elections.
There are probably still plenty of places around the UK where this has never died, but I couldn’t remember witnessing such an event during my adult years. Until about half an hour ago.
Yes, amidst the modern day multimedia wrangle of pissing out lies en masse from a distance via screens and type, I felt a warm tingle of something happening in the real world that I actually live in when I heard the unmistakable muffled screech of loudspeakered bullshit approaching.
As it came nearer I could make out the words, “Britain is full, end immigration, vote BNP” (time well spent – I’m sure they can now count on the full support of the people in this area, who hail from just about everywhere). It’s a well-worn lesson, but the message is not to yearn for nostalgic memories to revisit reality, or they’ll be forever ruined by a retarded scumbag with a megaphone.
One of the safest ways to distract those in possession of speech, who don’t yet have the counterpart brain to safely operate it, is through the use of music therapy. So we’d like to encourage all BNP members to download and listen (constantly) to our new 100% English music songs (recorded using German equipment, whilst guzzling Italian beer and munching American snacks and inspired by great musicians from everywhere – even ones who aren’t white).
By Bro. Jo Stern, on November 2nd, 2009
 It’s hard to swim against the love-to-hate tide that has swelled for these fecking little pricks from ITV’s shamelessly fake talent show; so much so that they’re even getting a mention from Foilface now.
We reckon their massive doubletake brothers ball-baggery heads would have been better received if they’d called themselves ‘Vanilla Twice’. Although in fairness they’re more ‘baby’ than ‘ice’ and “Ice Baby Baby” doesn’t quite scan.
Of course, if you want some real music 2 download for free, don’t think Cowell’s emotionally retarted freakshow of wailing scrotum sputum – think Foilface!
By Bro. Jo Stern, on July 14th, 2009
 “It costs me absolutely nothing to create the music. Zero dollars. I record all the guitars and bass straight into my laptop and program the drums using this one sequencing program, then I mix and master everything myself. The only thing that costs money are guitar strings, but I have a full-time job so it’s no big deal.”
– Ben Sharp
Isn’t this the way it should be? Ben Sharp is the person responsible for the one-man post-metal brainrash ‘Cloudkicker’ – I keep harping on about him but what’s not to like? He writes and records the most amazing instrumental metal on the planet, on his own, on his laptop then gives it away on the internet for free. Humble as fuck.
You can grab his EP and album here.
There is of course some more music 2 download for free over at the beasty Foilface website, why don’t you treat yourself to a bit of both and shuffle your mp3pod to blast your headplate in with a heady mix of slackercore and metalgaze you complete fucking mentalist?
By Bro. Jo Stern, on July 9th, 2009
 Sorry about the title, but some gags are so obvious that it’s just plain wrong not to run with them (just ask Tim Vine, he’ll back me up on this one).
Having an involuntary love of all things Foilface – and indeed foil-faced – myself and fellow ‘facer, Duncan Ratters, had to purchase and devour this foil-clad cow the minute we laid eyes on it. Only thing is, we didn’t get any further than this from sheer guilt – look how sad a sight he is with no more legs 
We’re now thinking of starting a foundation for abused foil-faced cows. The only trouble is that our recent music 2 download is free, so we need some help – please send us loads of massive donations so we can buy all the foil-faced chocolate cows in the country and ‘look after’ them.
By Bro. Jo Stern, on June 18th, 2009
 Long before the birth of this here internet and the mp3 revolution that spawned the now endless availability of music 2 download, these guys (Eric Clapton & Steve Winwood, for anyone who’s new to the planet) were knocking out many pleasing sounds that still get a healthy amount of air time today.
Although it’s just not considered ‘cool’ these days, Clapton is still up there on my guitar hero list and I enjoy the occasional over-indulgent bending of notes on my old black and white Strat in homage.
Clapton has always had that look of being just a bit too into it when he performs, but this snap from his latest “See ‘em While They’re Still Standing” tour, puts me in mind of the agony I once saw on my dad’s face the moment his back gave out whilst carrying some heavy paving slabs. Is it all getting a bit much for Eric?
By Bro. Jo Stern, on June 9th, 2009
 We’ve beavered away and finally got some kind of site together that we’re quite pleased with. There’s plenty yet to add as things progress, but at least we’ve got something decent to be going on with and – more importantly – you can now listen to and download the brand new Jean-Claude Naive EP from Foilface in it’s entirety for free! There’s also a cool Pussyfoot ringtone you can help yourself to for free. So, grab some great new music for free and get your free ringtone rocking right now.
By Bro. Jo Stern, on May 14th, 2009
 Whilst still in a mildly foetal form (until the soon to be released new EP busts forth that is), Foilface have already garnered their first ‘mentally unhinged fan’.
Known only as ‘Mystomunch’, the charming chappy emailed this lovely photo over to us with a simple message – “Dear Foilface, Eat the young, Lots of love Mystomunch x”.
I’m not totally sure what he’s trying to get at – is he saying Foilface are old? Is he advocating kiddy murder as a form of musical advancement? Or is he just a messy eater with a penchant for lamb and veal?
Whatever his message, it’s good to have him onboard. Let’s just hope he doesn’t do any of that Mark Chapman type nonsense. The Foilface agenda is simple – make top tunes to excite people’s ears. Nutters are just a bonus…
By Bro. Jo Stern, on May 8th, 2009
 Sore throat? Excessive coughing? Shortness of breath? Headache? Chills? Loss of appetite? Feverish?
If you’re suffering from all of the above the chances are you need a bit of Foilface in your life. Bookmark this page and get ready for news on how you can get hold of the ‘soon to be released’ six track EP, Jean-Claude Naive for FREE.
If you’re on the hunt for new music that’s got a bit more snot than the usual dry-nosed bollocks you’re tired of listening to, have a pre-release listen to the new stuff here and enjoy. The revolution is almost upon us.
By Bro. Jo Stern, on May 6th, 2009
 Has anyone ever really fully defined the term, ‘slacker rock’? For me it involves a loose, laid-back approach to alternative music mixed with what used to be called a ‘college rock’ sound. The proponents of this sound were bands like Pavement, Modest Mouse, Grandaddy, Built to Spill, Swearing at Motorists and Guided by Voices, who emerged in the early 1990′s. These bands took genres like shoegaze, garage rock and psychedelia, mixed them all together and spat out their findings. Sonically this loose collection of bands tended to be born out of a lo-fi approach to music (who needs expensive instruments and slick production sounds?) but ended up being more about a wonky approach to classic rock, mixed with lashings of tongue in cheek humour and surrealism – the classic albums of that genre and era being Pavement’s ‘Slanted & Enchanted’, ‘Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain’ and ‘Wowee Zowee’, Modest Mouse’s ‘The Lonesome Crowded West’ and Grandaddy’s ‘Under the Western Freeway’. If Pub-Rock was meat and two veg, Slacker-Rock was bacon and egg ice cream.
So, what’s Post-Slacker-Rock and who are it’s main proponents? Well, for me, Post-Slacker-Rock is a new extension of the old Slacker-Rock approach and aesthetic. If anything it blends in an even greater number of genre’s and styles than Slacker Rock and benefits from a new age of cheaper, better quality production equipment and from the diversity of music now available to the modern listener (due to the rise of the download).
I think Foilface are Post-Slacker-Rock – direct but surreal, poetic but immediate and sonically varied. Other bands that fall under the very loose bracket of Post-Slacker-Rock include Cymbals Eat Guitars, who hail from Staten Island, New York and offer a proggish take on slacker-rock, with brooding soundscapes, odd dreamlike lyrics and the classic quiet to loud take on alternatve music that builds and builds before taking off. Suckers (also from New York but this time, Brooklyn) belt out a late-Pavement meets I’m From Barcelona kind of sound, mixing lots of expansive sonics, including horns, lazy choral vocals and shout-a-long choruses as well as drone-ish and shoegazey moments.
It’s not all New York based though. There are also a couple of Australian bands who fall under PSR genre moniker. Quarter Acre and Sounds Like Sunset both hail from Sydney and where Quarter Acre opt for a better produced take on early Pavement, Sounds Like Sunset pull in influences like the Jesus & Mary Chain and Ride to summon up a shoegazey take on proceedings.
There’s also Hockey, a Canadian band whose, ‘Too Fake’ single got a fair bit of airplay on both sides of the Atlantic. Where the other groups have a very authentic and at times soup-thick take on the genre, Hockey head at things from a slightly glam-rock inspired angle and have a bit of a stadium sheen to their sound. Not quite as experiental but very accessible nonetheless.
Recent music seems to be cleaning up it’s act and climbing high as the world economy flounders. Maybe hard times yield great music or maybe it’s just a coincidence. Either way post-slacker rock rules. Try some.
By Bro. Jo Stern, on May 5th, 2009
 Last night heralded another top session down the Foilface bunker. Vocals were laid down for a new tune called, “A Fine Bromance” (think Field Music meets Polytechnic via Built To Spill and you’re nine fifteenths of the way there) and a entirely new song was created from scratch called, “Like a Buffalo” (or maybe “The Proviso”). The latter tune is a pretty hard one to describe – the closest I can come up with is, The Beta Band meets The Flying Pickets via Folk Implosion – so mush that into a mental sonic meatball and digest.
In other Foilface news, the band are now just a few weeks away from a release date for the first EP, Jean-Claude Naive. The website is about to be updated and wonkified and the EP artwork is in production. Bookmark this page in your favourites and you’ll be the first to find out when it’s released (and you can find out how to download it for FREE). That’s FREE music to download and it don’t get better than that…
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I was saying to the missus, on this general erection day morning, how I was feeling strangely nostalgic for the weird excitement I remember feeling as a kid when parties used to drive past our house blurting toss through a megaphone in the build up to elections.
